Adolescents: Parents need to understand them

Who are Adolescents & Youth?

According to WHO 'Adolescents' are individuals in the 10-19 years age group and 'Youth' are individuals in the 15-24 years age group. While 'Young People' covers the age range of 10-24 years. 

Why is this period difficult?

The Adolescence period is a transition from childhood to adulthood that involves 

• Dramatic physical, sexual, psychological, and social developmental changes, all taking place at the same time. 
• Risks to their health and well being of the individual as the young person are trying to cope with the inner conflict of striving for independence while still relying on adult support. 
• Inevitable clashes with parents, especially during the turbulent years of 13 to 16.

What are the hallmarks of the adolescent?

• Self-consciousness
• Self-awareness 
• Self-centredness 
• Lack of confidence.

These basic features lead to anxieties about the body, and 

• Many adolescents focus on their skin, body shape, weight, and hair. 
• Concerns about acne, curly hair, round shoulders and obesity.
• Special concerns about boy-girl relationships and maybe guilt or frustration about sexual matters. 
• Many adolescents, therefore, have a lack of self-worth or a poor body image. 
• They are very private people, and this must be respected. 
• While there are concerns about their identity, parental conflict, school, their peers, and the world around them, there is also innate separation anxiety.

What are the needs of adolescents?

• A ‘Room’ to move
• Privacy and confidentiality
• Security (e.g. stable home)
• Acceptance by peers & family
• Someone to rely on (e.g. parents or siblings or friends)
• Special ‘heroes’ or role models
• Establishment of an adult sexual role
• At least one really good personal relationship
• Respect from peers, family & society 

How does rebelliousness show?

Adolescents usually have a suspicion of and rebellion against convention and authority (parents, teachers, politicians, police, society, and so on). This attitude tends to fade away after leaving school (at around 18 years of age).

Common signs are:

• Criticizing and questioning parents
• Putting down family members or even friends
• Unusual, maybe outrageous, fashions and hairstyles
• Experimenting with drugs such as nicotine and alcohol
• Bravado and posturing
• Unusual, often stormy, love affairs.

Signs of out-of-control behavior are:

• Refusal to attend school
• Vandalism and theft
• Drug abuse
• Sexual promiscuity
• Eating disorders: anorexia, bulimia, severe obesity
• Depression.

Note: Beware of the risk of suicide if there are signs of depression.

What should parents do?

Wise parenting can be difficult because one cannot afford to be overprotective or too distant but not impossible. 

• Maintain good communication with your child & often talk to them. 
• Show concern and care but being flexible and giving the adolescent ‘space’ and time.

What is authoritative parenting? 

This approach is widely regarded as important to provide security during the transition to adulthood.

• Involves being firm and demanding of mature responsible behavior while still being warm and nurturing. 
• Also involves challenging moodiness gently, challenging negative thinking, encouraging positive social skills, and dealing with conflicts constructively.

What are the important management tips?

• Treat adolescents with respect and love
• Be non-judgemental
• Stick to reasonable ground rules of behavior (e.g. regarding alcohol, driving, language)
• Do not cling to them or show too much concern.
• Listen rather than argue.
• Listen to what they are not saying.
• Be flexible and consistent.
• Be available and responsive to help when requested.
• Give advice about diet and skincare too.
• Talk about sex and give good advice, but only when the right opportunity arises.
• Know the right questions to ask and where to seek help in a crisis.

What are healthy distractions?

Regular participation in sporting activities and other hobbies such as bushwalking, skiing, and so on with parents or groups is an excellent way to help them cope with this an important stage of their lives.

References:

1. https://www.who.int/southeastasia/health-topics/adolescent health#:~:text=WHO%20defines%20'Adolescents'%20as%20individuals,age%20range%2010%2D24%20years.
2. John M. Murtaghs Patient Education. of 6th revised ed edition. North Ryde NSW: McGraw-Hill Australia. 2012
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